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Learning to WINTER well.

In East Asian medicine they teach that “how well we thrive (or for most of us how well we survive) through the cycle of the seasons is dependent on how well we Winter”. 

I love this idea of “Wintering” as a verb and as something that we initiate for our “thrival” through life and all of its seasons.

What does “WINTERING” mean?

Wintering very simply means “Resting”. Like really resting. Not scrolling on your phone. Not reading or listening to podcasts or books. Not filling every available space with another to do.

Wintering is an art form, a feminine art form. The art of deep rest.

Our feminine earth and the animals and plants that inhabit her, show us so beautifully every year what “Wintering” really means. Through hibernation, they draw their energy inwards, conserving it so that come spring they will have the energy they need to support new growth and the sustained energy needed (without coffee or chocolate) to last right through until the leaves turn golden brown and cease to fall the following autumn. 

We are not taught to WINTER.

“Wintering” well (or at all) is not something we are taught in our mainstream educational systems, as let’s be honest, it’s not something that is taught in our modern world. Our modern, hyper-masculine world celebrates productivity, action, output and getting the to-do list done, no matter what the cost and often rejects or makes fun of the more feminine qualities of rest, restoration and rejuvenation. 

In truth, there is nothing wrong with these masculine qualities, it’s healthy to have goals and be productive; but too much of anything is not good, as all things in life require balance for true “thrival”. 

From my own experience, I spent 15+ years working in some very masculine business environments (corporate accounting, futures trading, insurance) and experienced multiple burnouts before I ever truly broached the topic of “REST”. It was in fact, the topic of burnout that brought me to this Feminine Embodiment in the first place and started this journey into the topic of “Learning to Winter” as an art form.

The Benefits of “Wintering” Well.

“Wintering” aka “Deep Rest” is NOT something that comes naturally to me. I have to make a conscious effort to switch off my mind. 

But…. Having experienced the immense benefits of learning to “Winter” well, such as:

• Balancing the nervous system
• Cognitive health and memory
• Emotional wellbeing
• Physiological and energetic wellness
• Support for the immune system
• Plus much more….

I am becoming ever more deeply passionate about this topic. Especially for us women who are in our peri-menopausal years — 35 – 49, known as the “Metal” years in Asian Medicine and 5 Element Theory. The years in which our fertility cycle and hormonal cycles are changing and as a result our energy levels are naturally decreasing. 

The 3 Winters specific to Women.

But “WINTERING” is NOT just about the season of winter that we are all familiar with. For women, there are 3 specific “winters” that we need to concern ourselves with: 

1- Our Inner Winter – Aka the days just before and during your period or if you are on a lunar cycle, New Moon although this can change depending on life circumstances.

2- Our Fertility Winter –  The years of late perimenopause and menopause.

3- Our Seasonal Winter – December, January, February in the Northern Hemisphere, June, July, August in the Southern Hemisphere.

As mentioned above, the Earth is our greatest teacher, she and the kingdoms that inhabit her show us so eloquently what it means to truly winter well. 

The 6 Essential Steps of learning to WINTER well.

This week I have been pondering the essential steps of Learning to “WINTER” well and what I have gathered from my journey over the past 4 years. What I have learned is that “Wintering Well” is not just about having the tools to winter well, of which there are many but it’s also about KNOWING WHEN, knowing WHAT you need and knowing HOW to meet those needs.

Here are “the 6 Essential Steps to Wintering Well” that I have gathered so far:

If you have more you wish to add respond to this email and let me know and we can broaden this list out together. 

1. Cycle Awareness

Have you been taught to push through when you have your period rather than taking the necessary time your body needs to restore? Perhaps when you were in your 20’s you breezed through the days you were on your period with endless energybut now in your 30’s and 40’s it’s much harder and you beat yourself up for not keeping up? 

Cycle awareness means different things to different people but I believe it is about truly getting to know yourself. Cycle Awareness orients us to where we are both in the seasons of the Earth and the ever changing landscape of our inner seasons.

As a woman, you move in a cyclical rhythm just like our feminine earth. If you pay close attention you will notice that you are affected by the seasonal cycle of the earth. You are also constantly changing through your monthly hormonal and fertility cycles which move in 7 year cycles (this is a fascinating topic which I will share more on soon).

To “Winter Well”, I believe that we must first of all know where we are in our cycles and work with our natural rhythms so that we can time our “wintering” accordingly. If you have never tracked your cycle and are interested to start be sure to access my cyclical living starter kit here.

Some reflection questions: Do you track your menstrual/ hormonal cycle? Do you know when your inner winter falls? Do you know where you are in your fertility cycle? How do you feel in autumn and winter each year? What does your body call you to do during these inner and outer seasons?

2. Knowing Your true Needs

Do you find yourself taking that 3rd cup of coffee when you are feeling tired or reaching for that bar of chocolate to fuel the afternoon slump? Or do you find yourself scrolling mindlessly on Instagram or marathon watching the newest series on Netflix? Or agreeing to meet a friend when you are exhausted?

I am guilty of all of these things so no judgement here if you are too, but what I have come to learn is that half the battle with knowing how to “Winter Well” is knowing what we need. Many of us have been conditioned to believe “we can sleep when we’re dead” and that we must do whatever it takes to push on.

Numbing out was the default for most of my life but as I slowly heal from this knowing the benefits I reap from truly resting, I’m gradually letting go and finding the pockets of time I need to restore rather than create false energy.

Some reflection questions: What are you feeling at the moment you start reaching for the afternoon coffee or the evening’s wine or the hour scrolling on social media? How do you feel after? What did you really need at that moment? Can you be mindful of this the next time it happens? 

3. Creating Loving Boundaries

Have you ever said yes when you wanted to say know? Have you had a colleague or a friend call you after hours or on the weekend invading your personal time? Have you ever eaten a full bar of chocolate and regretted it afterward?

Prentice Hempell put this so beautifully when he said  “Boundaries are the distance at which I can love both you and me simultaneously”. What I have found is that boundaries are not barriers to keep something out but a supportive foundation to allow us to regenerate from within. I have also found that boundaries are not always there to support you against other people but also a loving protector against yourself and your own unhelpful programming.

Creating Loving Boundaries is an essential part of “Wintering Well”. Why? Because when you are needing to say NO to the world and YES to yourself, boundaries created through knowing your needs are not just helpful but really powerful. They support you to create that foundation you need to regenerate from within so that you can be of greater service to yourself and to those people you love in your life. I’m sure you are far too familiar with the saying “you can’t fill from an empty cup, you should fill only from your saucer…”. If not then breathe that in.

Some reflection questions: What do you feel in your body when these situations occur? Anger, frustration, self loathing? What were you truly available for in that situation? What were you not available for? If you could roll back the clock,  how would you have preferred to respond in that situation? What boundaries can you lovingly create to get the rest you need in your inner and outer winters?

4. Clear Communication

How many times have you verbally reacted to a situation because you were not clear on how you felt, what you needed and/ or were unable to speak your truth? How many relationships were affected by such reactions?

Being able to express our needs and boundaries to friends and family is essential for “Wintering Well”. Why? Because for the most part, we are not taught to communicate our desires clearly and lovingly to our partners, families and peers which of course, can lead to all sorts of problems.

Many of these problems I feel, actually stems from point 3 above, not ‘knowing our true needs’ but when we can determine what it is we truly need to “winter well”, we can determine the words we need to communicate that to others to ensure we can meet those needs.

This is why I believe learning to communicate clearly is an essential step to learning to “winter well”. A great resource to read further on this topic is ‘Non-Violent Communication’ by Marshall Rosenberg. I love the steps they teach in this method, they are very easy and very useful. Be sure to read if you want help in this area.

Some reflection questions: What do you need to “Winter Well”? Who do you need to express this to to ensure your needs are met? How might you clearly and lovingly express that to that person or yourself? 

5. Setting “Wintering” Time Aside

We are all so busy with endless to-do lists for our personal lives, our work lives and for many of us our dependents (partners, children, pets, parents…). Finding rest time amongst all of that can feel like an impossible task but it is an essential when it comes to “Wintering Well”. Let’s be clear resting when you are dead is not an option!!

Referring back to point 1, Cycle Awareness becomes a powerful tool when it comes to setting time aside. When you track your cycle you can plan ahead, reschedule some meetings or not take clients for a few days. Plan some nourishing and supportive things for yourself like a massage or a restorative yoga class.

Believe me though, I absolutely know there are times that we cannot rearrange things or takes days off from work. I try to allocate myself 30 minutes in the day (usually the first 30 minutes after I get home) to practise “the art of doing nothing”, this involves a timer, a cup of tea and nothing else for 30 minutes. I try to just be present with myself, my tea and not much else.

I have found that setting time aside to dedicate to my “wintering” practices is an essential and quite often the most important thing on the to-do list.

Some reflection questions: Can you plan ahead to your inner and outer winter? Just before or during your period can you alot 30 minutes or more for yourself per day? How might that time look? What might you do to rest? 

6. Your “Wintering” Tools

Many teachers would put this first but let’s be honest, you can have all the tools in the world but if you haven’t set the stage to use those tools will they actually get used?

There are so many amazing tools out there to support deep, nurturing, restorative rest. I am sure that you have an entire tool box already but just in case you might like some inspo, I will add my favourites here to support you.

I do believe though that to “Winter Well” you must find what really works for you and what I rely on might not be supportive for you so by all means allow your creative feminine soul to sprinkle in her “wintering well” magic.

My favourite tools are –

Sleep, Yoga Nidra, Restorative Yoga, Baths, Cacao, Singing Mantra, Journalling, playing my Ukelele, the art of doing nothing, massage, mindfulness, Cold water dips, walks on the beach or in nature, hot water bottles in bed and stone medicine.

I’m sure there are many more and I purposefully haven’t included Retreats or Spa days as I want to emphasise how easy it is to “Winter Well” at home. If you want to restore your body, mind and spirit, sleep better, have better cognition, memory and health overall, it doesnt need to cost the earth, you can start simply from the comfort of your own home. 

Some reflection questions: What do you love to do that is nourishing for your body and mind? What supports you to feel rested and rejuvenated? What fuels you? 

Wintering Well into Deep Restoration

The aim and the benefit of all of these 6 essential steps of “Wintering Well” are to support you into a space of deep restoration.

As we age as woman, the need for restoration becomes more and more important, what we needed in terms of rest in our teens and 20’s is very different to what we need in our 30’s, 40’s and beyond. Burnout is not fun nor is arriving at the doors of perimenopause or menopause with all the symptoms that you might experience when you have not “Wintered Well”, the topic of another blog for sure. So give yourself this gift now of Learning to Winter well.

I hope these steps are supportive for you, let me know if you have any questions. Get in touch at support@niamhasple.com or if you want to book a 1-1 session you can do that here.

Much love and Happy Wintering,

Learning to WINTER well.

In East Asian medicine they teach that “how well we thrive (or for most of us how well we survive) through the cycle of the seasons is dependent on how well we Winter”. 

I love this idea of “Wintering” as a verb and as something that we initiate for our “thrival” through life and all of its seasons.

What does “WINTERING” mean?

Wintering very simply means “Resting”. Like really resting. Not scrolling on your phone. Not reading or listening to podcasts or books. Not filling every available space with another to do.

Wintering really is an art form, a feminine art form. The art of deep rest.

Our feminine earth and the animals and plants that inhabit her, show us so beautifully every year what “Wintering” really means.

Through hibernation, they draw their energy inwards, conserving it so that come spring they will have the energy they need to support new growth and the sustained energy needed (without coffee or chocolate) to last right through until the leaves turn golden brown and cease to fall the following autumn

We are not taught to WINTER.

“Wintering” well (or at all) is not something we are taught in our mainstream educational systems, as let’s be honest, it’s not something that is taught in our modern world.

Our modern, hyper-masculine world celebrates productivity, action, output and getting the to-do list done, no matter what the cost and often rejects or makes fun of the more feminine qualities of rest, restoration and rejuvenation. 

In truth, there is nothing wrong with these masculine qualities, it’s healthy to have goals and be productive; but too much of anything is not good, as all things in life require balance for true “thrival”. 

From my own experience, I spent 15+ years working in some very masculine business environments (corporate accounting, futures trading, insurance) and experienced multiple burnouts before I ever truly broached the topic of “REST”.

Burnout was in fact, the topic that brought me to ‘Feminine Embodiment in the first place and started this journey into the topic of “Learning to Winter” as an art form.

The Benefits of “Wintering” Well.

“Wintering” aka “Deep Rest” is NOT something that comes naturally to me. I have to make a conscious effort to switch off my mind. 

But…. Having experienced the immense benefits of learning to “Winter” well, such as:

• Balancing the nervous system
• Cognitive health and memory
• Emotional wellbeing
• Physiological and energetic wellness
• Support for the immune system
• Plus much more….

I am becoming ever more deeply passionate about this topic. Especially for us women who are in our peri-menopausal years — 35 – 49, known as the “Metal” years in Asian Medicine and 5 Element Theory.  These are the years in which our fertility cycle and hormonal cycles are changing and as a result our energy levels are naturally decreasing. 

The 3 Winters specific to Women.

But “WINTERING” is NOT just about the season of winter that we are all familiar with. For women, there are 3 specific “winters” that we need to concern ourselves with: 

1- Our Inner Winter – Aka the days just before and during your period or if you are on a lunar cycle, New Moon although this can change depending on life circumstances.

2- Our Fertility Winter –  The years of late perimenopause and menopause.

3- Our Seasonal Winter – December, January, February in the Northern Hemisphere, June, July, August in the Southern Hemisphere.

As mentioned above, the Earth is our greatest teacher, she and the kingdoms that inhabit her show us so eloquently what it means to truly winter well. 

The 6 Essential Steps of learning to WINTER well.

This week I have been pondering the essential steps of Learning to “WINTER” well and what I have gathered from my journey over the past 4 years. What I have learned is that “Wintering Well” is not just about having the tools to winter well, of which there are many but it’s also about KNOWING WHEN, knowing WHAT you need and knowing HOW to meet those needs.

Here are “the 6 Essential Steps to Wintering Well” that I have gathered so far:

If you have more you wish to add then send me an email and let me know and we can broaden this list out together. 

1. Cycle Awareness

Have you been taught to push through when you have your period rather than taking the necessary time your body needs to restore? Perhaps when you were in your 20’s you breezed through the days you were on your period with endless energy but now in your 30’s and 40’s it’s much harder and you beat yourself up for not keeping up? 

Cycle awareness means different things to different people but I believe it is about truly getting to know yourself. Cycle Awareness orients us to where we are both in the seasons of the Earth and the ever changing landscape of our inner seasons.

As a woman, you move in a cyclical rhythm just like our feminine earth. If you pay close attention you may notice that you are affected by the seasonal cycle of the earth. You are also constantly changing through your monthly hormonal and fertility cycles which move in 7 year cycles (this is a fascinating topic which I will share more on soon).

To “Winter Well”, I believe that we must first of all know where we are in our cycles and work with our natural rhythms so that we can time our “wintering” accordingly.

If you have never tracked your cycle before and are interested to start be sure to access my cyclical living starter kit here.

Some reflection questions: Do you track your menstrual/ hormonal cycle? Do you know when your inner winter falls? Do you know where you are in your fertility cycle? How do you feel in autumn and winter each year? What does your body call you to do during these inner and outer seasons?

2. Knowing Your true Needs

Do you find yourself taking that 3rd cup of coffee when you are feeling tired or reaching for that bar of chocolate to fuel the afternoon slump? Do you find yourself scrolling mindlessly on Instagram or marathon watching the newest series on Netflix? Or agreeing to meet a friend when you are exhausted?

I am guilty of all of these things so no judgement here if you are too, but what I have come to learn is that half the battle with knowing how to “Winter Well” is knowing what we need. Many of us have been conditioned to believe “we can sleep when we’re dead” and that we must do whatever it takes to push on.

Numbing out was the default for most of my life but as I slowly heal from this I have come to learn that what I really need or needed the whole time was actual REST. And knowing the benefits I reap from truly resting, I’m gradually letting go of my default and finding the pockets of time I need to restore rather than create false energy.

Some reflection questions: What are you feeling at the moment you start reaching for the afternoon coffee or the evening’s wine or the hour scrolling on social media? How do you feel after? What did you really need at that moment? Can you be mindful of this the next time it happens? 

3. Creating Loving Boundaries

Have you ever said yes when you wanted to say know? Have you had a colleague or a friend call you after hours or on the weekend invading your personal time? Have you ever eaten a full bar of chocolate and regretted it afterward?

Prentice Hempell put this so beautifully when he said  “Boundaries are the distance at which I can love both you and me simultaneously”.

What I have found is that boundaries are not barriers to keep something out but a supportive foundation to allow us to regenerate from within.

I have also found that boundaries are not always there to support you against other people but also a loving protector against yourself and your own unhelpful programming.

Creating Loving Boundaries is an essential part of “Wintering Well”. Why? Because when you are needing to say NO to the world and YES to yourself, boundaries created through knowing your needs are not just helpful but really powerful. They support you to create that foundation you need to regenerate from within so that you can be of greater service to yourself and to those people you love in your life.

I’m sure you are far too familiar with the saying “you can’t fill from an empty cup, you should fill only from your saucer…”. If not then breathe that in.

Some reflection questions: What do you feel in your body when your boundaries are crossed? Anger, frustration, self loathing? What were you truly available for in that situation? What were you not available for? If you could roll back the clock,  how would you have preferred to respond in that situation? What boundaries can you lovingly create to get the rest you need in your inner and outer winters?

4. Clear Communication

How many times have you verbally reacted to a situation because you were not clear on how you felt, what you needed and/ or were unable to speak your truth? How many relationships were affected by such reactions?

Being able to express our needs and boundaries to friends and family is essential for “Wintering Well”. Why? Because for the most part, we are not taught to communicate our desires clearly and lovingly to our partners, families and peers which of course, can lead to all sorts of problems.

Many of these problems I feel, actually stem from point 3 above, not ‘knowing our true needs’ but when we can determine what it is we truly need to “winter well”, we can determine the words we need to communicate that to others to ensure we can meet those needs.

This is why I believe learning to communicate clearly is an essential step to learning to “winter well”. A great resource to read further on this topic is ‘Non-Violent Communication’ by Marshall Rosenberg. I love the steps they teach in this method, they are very easy and very useful. Be sure to read if you want help in this area.

Some reflection questions: What do you need to “Winter Well”? Who do you need to express this to to ensure your needs are met? How might you clearly and lovingly express that to that person or yourself? 

5. Setting “Wintering” Time Aside

We are all so busy with endless to-do lists for our personal lives, our work lives and for many of us our dependents (partners, children, pets, parents…). Finding rest time amongst all of that can feel like an impossible task but it is an essential when it comes to “Wintering Well”. Let’s be clear resting when you are dead is NOT an option!!

Referring back to point 1, Cycle Awareness becomes a powerful tool when it comes to setting time aside. When you track your cycle you can plan ahead, reschedule some meetings or not take clients for a few days. Plan some nourishing and supportive things for yourself like a massage or a restorative yoga class.

Believe me though, I absolutely know there are times that we cannot rearrange things or takes days off from work. I try to allocate myself 30 minutes in the day (usually the first 30 minutes after I get home) to practise “the art of doing nothing”, this involves a timer, a cup of tea and nothing else for 30 minutes. I try to just be present with myself, my tea and not much else.

I have found that setting time aside to dedicate to “wintering” practices is an essential and quite often the most important thing on the to-do list.

Some reflection questions: Can you plan ahead to your inner and outer winter? Just before or during your period can you alot 30 minutes or more for yourself per day? How might that time look? What might you do to rest?

6. Your “Wintering” Tools

Many teachers would put this first but let’s be honest, you can have all the tools in the world but if you haven’t set the stage to use those tools will they actually get used?

There are so many amazing tools out there to support deep, nurturing, restorative rest. I am sure that you have an entire tool box already but just in case you might like some inspo, I will add my favourites here to support you.

I do believe though that to “Winter Well” you must find what really works for you and what I rely on might not be supportive for you so by all means allow your creative feminine soul to sprinkle in her “wintering well” magic.

My favourite tools are –

Sleep, Yoga Nidra, Yin Yoga, Restorative Yoga, Baths, Cacao, Singing Mantra, Journalling, playing my Ukelele, the art of doing nothing, massage, mindfulness, Cold water dips, walks on the beach or in nature, hot water bottles in bed and stone medicine.

I’m sure there are many more and I purposefully haven’t included Retreats or Spa days as I want to emphasise how easy it is to “Winter Well” at home. If you want to restore your body, mind and spirit, sleep better, have better cognition, memory and health overall, it doesnt need to cost the earth, you can start simply from the comfort of your own home. 

Some reflection questions: What do you love to do that is nourishing for your body and mind? What supports you to feel rested and rejuvenated? What fuels you? 

Wintering Well into Deep Restoration.

The aim and the benefit of all of these 6 essential steps of “Wintering Well” are to support you into a space of deep restoration.

As we age as woman, the need for restoration becomes more and more important, what we needed in terms of rest in our teens and 20’s is very different to what we need in our 30’s, 40’s and beyond.

Burnout is not fun nor is arriving at the doors of perimenopause or menopause with all the symptoms that you might experience when you have not “Wintered Well” (the topic of yet another blog for sure). So give yourself this gift now of Learning to Winter well.

I hope these steps are supportive for you, let me know if you have any questions. Get in touch at support@niamhasple.com or if you want to book a 1-1 session you can do that here.

Much love and Happy Wintering,

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